What a relieve .. attachment finally over haha.. Was really touched of how everyone was so nice to me on my last day haha! They made a party gathering with everyone to say farewell to me .. ordered pizza and kfc just for me ... Haha so cool =)! Sure to miss them such cool people ...

Well today ... early start in the morning .. 7 am already meet atik she was waiting for me at the bus stop already haha ... we went out to clinic ... than after that went to watch pirates of caribbean haha .. I wasnt a fan of it .. didnt even watch the first and second one .. but it was kinda cool and funny movie .. =)! Anywayz that was the only show we could watch .. haha! The most funny thing was stepping into TM And century square at 9 in the morning haha and every store was close ... and we catched the movie at 10am .. who watch movie so early hahaa!! Oh well thats it .. =)!

Woot winner of American Idol Season 6 Year 2007 Jordin Sparks!! Yay haha .. I was so right when i wanted her to win from the start! She rocks =)! Her new single she sing beautifully and very nice lyrics! ;)!



This Is My Now

There was a time I packed my dreams away
Living in a shell, hiding from myself.
There was a time when I was so afraid
I thought I'd reached the end.
Baby, that was then.
But I am made of more than my yesterdays.

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can't believe the love I see.
My fear's behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.

I had to decide.
Was I gonna play it safe?
Or look somewhere deep inside,
Try to turn the tide.
Find the strength to take that step of faith?

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can't believe the love I see.
My fear's behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.

I have a courage like never before, yeah.
I settled for less, but I'm ready for more.
Ready for more…

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can't believe the love I see.
My fear's behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can't believe the love I see.
My fear's behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.
This is my now.

Haha the joke during the final 2 performance round .. Check this out ..



Haha melinda facial reaction was funny when jordin was singing her last song =P!

Well i feel like im getting the hang of everything .. Guess i took a real turn on how i see things and my attitude towards everything ... Which is good thing for myself i guess .. But more of the couldnt care less attitude .. but more on the positive side i suppose haha .. oh well

A few hrs ago .. the most ridiculous thing just happen but i got nothing to comment i guess but i just dont understand what she's feeling .. the scumbag wants to go out and u keep asking him where he's going and he say its non of ur business and u ask if he's coming home and he say he will call if he comes home than so be it .. he doesnt care about you thats how selfish he is ... let him be la .. why the hell u get so upset over it ... And i really have no idea what to do .. for pits sake .. im ur son ... I should be asking u questions .. not the other way round .. U cried in front of me saying "Ibu sedih..la adik".. So what u expect me to do? I already beat him up and he already beat me up the other day .. What else do u want .. And all i did was tell her why ur being so nice when he dont even care .. whats the use ... she dont get it .. she can ask me what i want her to do .. its her life .. and she asking me what i want her to do .. Anywayz i already told her what needs to be done .. but shes not doing anything also ... Im in the stage where everything is like what the hell should i do .. damn i just wish someone would just help me ... or something i feel so helpless .. first the laptop i dont even know what to do about it now and she dont even know yet .. and now this .. Arghh !! Im so frustrated !! But i know its just growing up and learning and whatever .. and im handling it .. i just i dont know sighh .. oh well ..

Enough of that :)! Its up to me to make myself happy and i run my life so why make myself miserable life still goes on ;)! haha !

Oh lets talk about the Anything and Whatever Drink u guys heard of it right haha .. especially the advertisements so lame sia ... The one where the dad was dying and he say i will give u whatever .. than he was refering to the can drink than he died haha so lame right. Anywayz listen u guys the drink is actually really anything or whatever its like they choose the drink for u cause u already choose Anything or Whatever haha .. the radio says .. the drink either would be coke, green tea, ice lemon tea or whatever ... so yaa really anything or whatever haha! funny right .. so its like they pick u a drink and its random .. Kinda cool and innovative haha!

Kk thats all i have to talk about i suppose ... Not sure if im looking forward to friday or not its the last day of attachment .. everyones at work is counting down for me and disturbing me haha ... and my LO coming down to talk to my boss hopefully everythings goes fine ... alright nite people!

4 more days after today till attachment is over .. Looking forward to it ?!?!
Maybe not .. Fypj coming up next with no holiday damn no chance to relax .. at least one week also dont have?!
Haha ... oh well hope good supervisor .. good team mates other than that i going full speed ahead to give my all!

So anywayz .. last friday done the ipp report finish and showed the boss and he sign all my stuff and grade my overall performance .. Well all Good .. Good enough for me haha =P! Was suprise of how nice he was. Well seems like its all over but 4 more days .. not sure what im doing also .. surfing net and stuff acting like im doing research but i dont know what im doing also haha!

Well well .. the report ... i show my boss it and he said nothing bout it .. and i send my LO for vetting and this is what he replied...

"Dear Ruzaini

Do not mention anything about lack of knowledge, attribute it to lack of time and resource constraints as the factor.
Since your work is not completed, do a hand over document, stating what has been done, and wat are the work that is outstanding.
If it is half completed, please document down what is completed and what needs to be followed up. This document should be passed to your Supervisor so that the next intern can take care of it.

Remember, do a proper handover session to ur boss, or whoever is best to take over your work. "

In my heart .. what the hell right .. i told my boss i dont know how to do it and he was ok with it and now my LO saying otherwise .. and my boss didnt even ask me to document anything .. so must i or must i not ? Haizz .. but i did make a document of progress on what i done .. so if they ask i guess i just show them that ..! No big deal haha ... Lots of miscommunication shit .. NYP Sux! Attached students anyhow and give us hell .. and anything happens its all our fault ..! How crap! Oh well..
Alright so attachment is going to be over soon .. Kinda so call looking forward to fypj ... Laptop issue is not settled ... More shyts happening at home ... Im hanging on! ;)!
"He hit my mum .. It feels so good to hit him .... he got all the bruises on his face and i think he deserves it .. a few cuts on my forehead and blueblacks on my left arm and back is not that bad .. I thought u said u could beat me to death if u could .. why not? I swear damn jerk u live to regret what u did to me over something u wont admit that u did was wrong till u got so ego and aggressive to start hitting us! Pure jerk! And Whatever my mom is thinking im so hating her .. Endless crap ... shes still giving in to him!"

I've changed and im gonna live another day, month and year and no one is gonna stop me except for myself .. So full speed ahead =)!

Its taken much too long
to get it right
Would it be so wrong
to maybe find someone
A miracle

And all you really need
is everything you could never be
And so you'd give it all
for a miracle

Chorus:
Is there a trace
inside her face
of a lonely miracle?
And so you wait
and lie awake
for a lonely miracle

You never really know
what it is --
not until it goes
And if it comes again
it's a miracle

But what you miss is love
and everything below and up above
And could she bring it all --
a miracle?

Chorus (1x)

All you wanted was a
All you needed was a miracle
A miracle
And all you wanted was a
All you needed was a miracle
A miracle

Its taken so long
to get it right
Could it be so wrong
to maybe find someone
A miracle

Chorus (2x)

A miracle
A miracle

Alright the truth is out ... Seriously i dunno how to react ... Firstly, cause u lied to me through ur mouth for 1 month to me .. on the other hand u didnt expect it to happen la .. neither do i oh well ... but since it happen already and u say ur gonna get a new one for me .. Im having problems processing or picturing everything that have happen already also .. because im not sure what im gonna tell my mom since the thing havent finish paying yet and stuff .. Sighh and how can you and kak nur get a new one .. just like that how bout ur daily expenses .. I seriously dunno what to do !! ... Sighh ... Oh well hope i get through this hurdle!

And seriously im through with all the so call shyt people .. I realise its good sometimes that u know people for who they really are .. Some people are plain jerks and assholes haha! Siapa Terasa TOO BAD! But those who are so full of themselves and dont feel that im talking about them .. They seriously need an attitude adjustment haha.. On the other hand, some people are really great .. U know who u guys are .. those who been there for me .. and i look up to when i have problems .. Thanks a lot for hearing me out and everything .. U have no idea how much i really appreciate it!

Ok my 2nd rubbish post today sorry due to my weird major boredom TODAY haha! The picture above is just one of the rubbish kiddish crap i been messing and scribbling when im bored and paranoid haha! I think if i kept everything that i thrown in the rubbish bin and some in my file now all the months/weeks of scribbling .. Maybe there's major paper craps everywhere haha!! IM WASTING PAPER!! but who cares =P! Ok thats all ...

Alright i got nothing to do in the office .. Im on strike .. sick of everything .. haha ... guess maybe next week i got a better motivation .. 2 WEEKS LEFT !!!!! Thanks everyone who's been talking to me keeping me company i greatly appreciate it and further more those who actually listen to my constant crap ..

Sorry i know im going crazy haha! And Krystal ur the bestest mummy friend sister whatever online buddy haha! =P!! Love u so muchh!

Ok .. So the $1 Dollar coins above .. haha.. i didnt realise i had 6 of them well quite a lot for me .. cause i hate to keep coins .. i use to remember all my coins i gave yani to keep :P haha! guess last time she got rich thanks to me over coins haha! so from top to bottom ... 1988,1989,1990,1995,1997,2006 haha! REally shows the color difference sia!! 2006 is so super shiny and 1988 so super dull haha! Ok im crazy thats all =P! CAUSE IM SO FREAKING BORED!!

Lol .. Funny thing i heard on the radio !! People selling an imaginary friend on EBAY! And over 30 people have bidded already and the highest bid so far cost like $4,000 singapore dollars HAHA!

Here's a picture of the imaginary friend ..


CLICK HERE to see the ebay bidding!

Remember to read the comments below at the website bidding page funny shyt!

Hey hey everyone here i am Spelling out the word B - O - R - E - D ! lol ..
How pathetic am i ... like totally been reading jokes and surf net today .. I cant do the thing .. i think i given up trying already sighh oh well .. Not forgetting the mp3 songs on my phone haha to keep me awake and the radio 98.7 FM man !! haha ..

Oh and ya i won something on a game of it last thursday .. The game "Did he just say that!?!"

Lol .. if u guys hear the radio that is .. it happens every weekdays at 6pm .. They say i won .. Spiderman 3 cd soundtrack and 2 tickets to The Swimming Instructor Play?? No idea what play is it oh well just waiting to get the gifts when they arrive in my mailbox =P!

Oh and ya .. there's this so call Amazing Race kinda thing happening in singapore .. The N95 wireless adventure .. Nokia.com is having go there and check it out and click this so call logo below i didnt link it lazy go there urself if u wanna sign up haha!



I heard its like testing people how well they know singapore ..
1st prize is $7000 and 2 sets of N95 phones.
2nd prize is $5000 and 2 sets of N95 phones.
3rd prize is $3000 and 1 set of N95 phone.

Haha im sure about the 1st prize but i think i got the figures wrong for the 2nd and 3rd =P! Who cares i was like woah cool prizes but i dont think im that kind of person to take part =P! So if u guys wanna take part ... Sign up ends by next week! And the thing happening on 26th may saturday .. How cool right after attachment and fypj shit is over! LOL..

Ok im done talking rubbish now im gonna find stupid things to do until 6 so i can get outta here!! B-O-R-I-N-G! <-- janice favourite word hahaha!

Snow patrol - Signal fire (Spiderman 3 Soundtrack)

The perfect words never crossed my mind
Cause there was nothing in there but you
I felt every ounce of me, screaming out
But the sound was trapped deep in me

All I wanted, just sped right past me
But I was rooted fast to the earth
I could be stuck here for a thousand years
Without your arms to drag me out

There you are, standing right in front of me (x2)
All this fear falls away, you leave me naked
Hold me close,
cause I need you to guide me to safety

No, I won't wait forever (x2)

In the confusion, and the aftermath
You are my signal fire
The only resolution and the only joy
Is the faint spark of forgiveness in your eyes

There you are, standing right in front of me (x2)
All this fear falls away, you leave me naked
Hold me close,
cause I need you to guide me to safety

There you are,
standing right in front of me (x2)
All this fear falls away, you leave me naked
Hold me close,
cause I need you to guide me to safety

No, I won't wait forever (x3)

The life ... described by people .. and what i see it as ..

Life should be what you want it to be and how u make it ..
No one says life was fair ..
Everyone have the chance to make the choices in life ..
Everything are meant to happen its just how life takes its course ..
Its not how bad or how good life goes about its just how people handle it by making it happen ..
There's up and downs in life thats what make the colors in the sky if not it be dull ..


And ya blablabla the list go on about life whatever this and whatever that ..

I been looking at my life whether it was the past .. or the future .. or the present or the whatever ... Im feeling so .. I dont know ... example this year .. Ya right .. the big 2 starting of ur age .. how great .. I thought i could get through with everything and not stuck with my hell of shyt past .. And u know like everyone say .. like my teacher use to say A new year is a new chapter of ur life .. Start it new and fresh .. Sighh .. but this 2007 ... This year .. been a so call total nightmare and crap and seriously whatever .. I dont know how to handle everything .. I didnt expect everything to take a sudden turn and seriously turn me off .. Whats going on .... Whats up .. Why this why that .. But i know im not suppose to question all this .. And maybe im thinking too much .. Its just life taking its course .. and what i need to experience .. and face .. and learn .. and grow .. and stop being pessimistic all the time .. and look at it differently .. I dont know but i really not handling everything thats going on very well .. sighh .. But hanging on ... aha a friend said .. something like ... "Your happy times will come soon or something like that" Haizz im looking forward to that .. but for the time being im fine but just feeling really down ... to be facing some hard times ...

Since im done talking about all the rubbish i wish to say haha .. Im goin to go get ready for bed and hope tmrw would be a better day =)!

Everything goes great today except for the part where the pizza hut was cancelled haha .. stupid reason oh well but we did have a nice time eating at food culture .. and of course the movie was a blast ... How i wish i could watch it again haha ..

The party at my aunt's house was fine as normal .. just felt different .. oh well guess i have changed .. and they are reacting to it ... me not being bothered to visit them or chat with them as much as i use to .... haha ..

Well tmrw back to reality in the office ... haizz ... seriously felt like today was sunday or something haha .. oh well .. At least i had fun today =)!

Woot look above the tix!! haha .. kiasu me ... already planned everything hope atik not reading this haha! Watching spiderman 3 tmrw .. with my sec school frens ... with my mom! Bestest friends ever ... The only people who i can be myself and they just love me the way i am haha! Guess i know now who my real friends are already! =P! Woot gonna have a great time tmrw .. everything planned nicely indeed .. got atik's gifts and all rubbish haha! Than i planned gonna eat pizza hut tmrw with them my treat !! haha .. And not forgetting tmrw i need to go my aunt's house after all the fun with them .. cause its my aunt's youngest daughter birthday .. Jazlina .. and not forgetting i miss all the little ones so much .. So looking forward to tmrw! =)