Alright finally weekends are here... I dunno what im gonna do .. but im still stress over the project .. although some parts of it work now .. i still need to figure out how to do the other parts .. Sighh .. !!

Look below .. thats what i got today .. Im not sure whether im suppose to be happy or sad .. or whatever haha .. It is quite a nice sum to be getting on an attachment .. but on the other hand im not handling the project that well .. =(! Sigh .. oh well hope i will do fine :P!



Anywayz I heard of the movie "Freedom Writers" and i really wanna go watch it .. maybe ask atik along .. or whoever haha chat with her online yesterday and she say so long never go out together especially with me and she say i keep giving excuses when there's meeting or something .. i was like "What!?!?!" -.- haha .. and dont worry atik i know ur birthday is coming =P! Maybe i gonna ask her watch movie tmrw .. but see la my mood how .. im lazy to go anywhere also want to spend time trying to figure out the project .. Sighh!!! STRESS TENSION haha!

Things are going fine at work i suppose .. The same normal people who i say good morning too are all nice everyday haha ... same old chirpy people =)! And more people starting to talk to me ... no idea why hahaha .. One guy i met in the lift when i was going home was kinda funny .. He was like .. "U 3d networks staff ar?!?" haha .. I was like "No.. Im just on attachment" and thats it haha!

Anywayz .. was kinda late for work today came in 9.30am haha .. good thing my OIC got meeting today coming in after lunch .. my kakak was like disturbing me when i came .. "Wah .. adik siangnyer haha!" than she also comment that my face like just woke up from bed hahaha!

Tell everyone a secret i been kinda late like everyday la .. no one seem to care hahah! But can't keep doing it not good =P!

Darn im so lazy to come to work la actually haha .. felt like wanted to sleep more! Cause last night i was watching this nice show call "Heart of A Stranger.." When my mom came back i was like telling her .. darn i shouldnt have change to this hallmark channel now i want to watch the show until the end haha! It was really a very nice show ..

Its about this lady who got heart failure .. and she had to wait for a donor to give her their heart .. and everyone in the family including her own daughter was getting ready for her death .. but miraculously .. a guy who was dying from a motorbike accident .. wanted to donate every part of his organs and everything to the hospital .. So .. The interesting part was .. the lady get to live her life having someone elses heart .. and the story was about she felt like the guy was present inside of her .. like she have another person inside of her .. Very interesting really =)!

Alright enough of me bloggin haha ... been lazy to blog .. and never been bloggin this long for so long haha! Alright byezz !

Sighh ...
I been telling myself all over the years .. Everything happens for a reason and that every second you are at a place makes a difference cause you were meant to be there for some sort of whatever reasons . I had always believe that .. But besides that .. sometimes i question why im even here to face all this setbacks in life .. Family probs .. Personal probs .. to the verge where i myself keep experiencing it and im getting sick and tired of even wanting to wake up to face the next day anymore ...

Oh well .. people say no one tell us life was fair right .. we just have to live it to the fullest ... Guess im still working on that ...
Anywayz i heard a quote on radio haha =P been working and listening to 98.7 FM only .. Keeps me less bored =P Anywayz the quote is :
Life is not about the number of breathe you take but its about the number of times it takes your breathe away...

Cool huh?!? hahaha ... Anywayz .. I been kinda anti social lately cause sometimes i just feel comfortable being on my own maybe cause no one is ever there for me whenever i needed someone i guess .. Thats life you just have to stand on ur own two feet sometimes =) And i believe i will be fine ;)!

One thing i keep in mind also is that .. There's people worst off and everyone have their own problems its just how each and every individual handle it thats all =P

"Is it somethin you been interested in gettin into?
If you like it enough, you'll learn more 'n more, it'll all come to you"

Amazing how two sentences makes so much sense ..
Actually the answer is .. I like IT and everything about it .. Computers and all but programming isnt just what im so good at i guess .. Oh well but like she said ..

"If you like it enough, you'll learn more 'n more, it'll all come to you" Thanks Jo =)!

Darn feeling like shyt la =/!
Its one thing to keep enduring for 12 weeks being told or ACTUALLY KNOW what to do everyday everyweek u come .. But its another thing when u need to endure and think what u need to do and its totally not working out for u everyday everyweek of the 12 weeks .. darn .. Going Crazy ..

Why am i in such position or am i putting myself in this position I dont know already what the hell im doing or what the hell is going on!! I just wish to SHOUT HELP !! But who the hell would haha! Sighhhh Worst endless nightmare .. 3rd week already and still got 9 more weeks of nightmare .. I just wish it would end ..

Ooooo .. Results out =) And its all good =P! Can relax ... a bit .. Everythings good .. But still got attachment to think about .. Need go sleep already!!

Lol .. I got nothing to do .. at work now .. Kinda given up doing the sql stuff for the database cant quite get it! Think gonna do it tmrw =P! haha ! Gonna be 6pm anywayz .. relaxing and surfing the net now! OMG GUESS WHAT !!

Sony ericsson have released their new phone!! I like !! W880I !! Lol .. Gonna be my new phone soon if i ever gonna change =P!



Later at home blog more .. haha if they catch me bloggin im dead =P!!

Let me tell u guys a story that happen yesterday .. Lets use devil and angel to describe this two people alright .. I guess some people will understand what im talking about haha ... Just wanna let it out .. Getting worst than ever ..

Alright the freaking devil got home at 3 am in the morning .. and the angel ask the devil why and why always come home late and whatever .. and ya keep bugging go where do what and whatever .. I guess the angel can get a bit annoying but i know that the angel only showing that she care.. But u know what that asshole devil did? He push her on the floor and start throwing all the laundry stuff at the kitchen there la ..

Alright and the rascal that was sleeping was like WTF .. What the hell is going on .. Cause he heard a sound impact like someone fall down and things started falling and they freaking shouting over and over! So much for the little rascal having a sweet sound sleep right.. So he just woke up from his bed and go the kitchen and was like telling the devil.. What the hell is wrong with you! And once the rascal said that to the devil .. The angel was like nvm ... go back to bed .. and he was like ok than dont want to make anything worst .. But than when the rascal go back to bed all they did was quarrel louder and louder la! The rascal was like wtf all the way trying to sleep ... and really felt like bursting into tears u know cause this full of shyt things like practically happen everyday and its nonstop and it can be such a stressful thing that can lead the rascal to pure desperation sighh!

Haha last post of the day! I manage to snap the picture of the reception haha! and one of the staff saw me and he was like .. Wah got spy in our office .. he was making a joke out of it .. disturb me with the other staff saying like how much i get paid for spying and all that haha! Oh well .. =P! So the reception there got the planetone thing there cause my company 3d Networks is part of this whole big other company call Planet One so yap! haha!

And not forgetting the little buffet we had! the visitors never go eat .. So all of us were like eating every bit thats left of them haha! Some of them even tapao home .. Fun day today =)!

Alright night! Have to work tmrw! lol byee..

Haha .. alright things are looking at the bright side finally .. I ask my OIC to sign my logbook today for my last week's performance and i was worried what i wrote in it would cause him to ask me a lot of questions.. haha but the funny thing was .. he didnt even bother to read .. "he was like i dont know what your writing so i just gonna sign" i was like u need to grade me for the week haha. Than he was like "Never mind i will give u a GOOD" than he sign i was like oh ok haha.

Than furthermore today i ask for assurance from him cause i wasnt really sure what i was suppose to do la .. But now everythings good .. Everythings on track! I got it so clearly and full of confidence that i could do what he wants already =)!!

Haha for now im just relaxing and i saw this top search on yahoo about snorers haha so i came across this site where they explain why some people snore haha! Go check it out =P! THE SITE click here!

Darn .. a week and 4th day today at attachment .. And seriously i have not done anything worthwhile at all la!! ARghhhh full of crap!! Lol.. Oh well anywayz yesterday went to meet yani after work and had a long and cool chat about everything ... Lol .. And sorry zila .. I was too tired to go your house =P! Anywayz now im at the office .. when i came earlier so many visitors (eurasian and china people) was around i heard dunno what seminar is going on .. and got buffet la .. the smell of the food making me hungry haha but i doubt its for us ... oh well i brought my own food anywayz.

Arghh stress la i dunno how to do!!!!! Borrow books watch videos .. got a view of what i was gonna do but now its all like DOH!! I dun even know what im gonna do .. Omg ... Crap la! haha .. i think by next week i need to talk to my BOSS la .. If this goes on i dunno what the hell im doing also haha! Alright left today and tmrw gonna go crazy totally gonna figure out what im gonna do and all! IF I CANT THAN IM TALKING TO HIM ON MONDAY LA! DRIVING ME NUTS !! lol! #$#@%$^#@%&%^$^$ <- Thats my going crazy sign or so call full of cursingS! lol...

Loving the company and the people ..
But the project is totally killing me slowly.
I been trying my best to put in effort to do.
But the assurance of everything working and how to do it totally is actually 20% which is not enough when i want to do something =/!

I just wish i got all the answers or user guide in front of me and all i need to do is read them up and know what to be implemented and get done.
Other than keep coming here everyday .. research and trying to do everything which totally doesnt work for me!

Damn dying in silence due to this stress madness!
And at home haven't been the best place to go home to either oh well rather not talk about it!

All i have now is holding on tight with every little last drop of positiveness thats left in me! Being negative never helps but make everything worst so nowadays just have to be positive and hopefully things will go out that way ;)!

Alright some pictures of my company.. Cant take the reception picture .. lots of people keep walking there haha! And yeap .. Im trying to get use to everything and need to hit the books soon.. Cause the project is sure gonna kill me if i dont!


The view of one part of the office behind my desk.. There's more on the other side! The company is one whole level divided into departments like Finance, Technicians etc.


My desk Boring hah!


The place where all the staff hangoout whenever they want drinking coffee, joke around and so on haha got coffee maker and whatsoever. Have my lunch there if i bring TAPAO haha =P!

Not so bad today .. Had lunch with a group of people who are way older than me haha .. I think all over age of 30 already but i had fun with them =).. They were really nice. I cant call them auntie lol they ask me to call them sister so .. Sis Rosnah and Nana (lets call them Sister in malay = "Kak" Nana easier and sounds nicer for me) ask me along to go eat with them cause already plan on wednesday they told me cause they were asking me along that day also but i brought my mom's nasi lemak to eat so they say friday =P! Than i say ok. So yaa went to eat lunch with them and 2 other people, One call Tina and the other call Darren. Darren was the one driving us there. We went eat somewhere at serangoon central haha. They were very friendly talking normally about this and that and everything was going fine =)!

Than i was like really to the edge of not sure how to figure out the project already so i was talking to Kak Nana about it. Was asking her if anyone else ever got attached here and stuff and she said never out of the 2 yrs she been working here. So i was like telling her no wonder Mr Pang, My boss doesnt know the procedure never introduce me and so on.. Than she was like emphasizing to me that Mr Pang didnt actually pass me the project so it would really be done. He just want to know whether i can do it if its POSSIBLE .. Than i was like oh ok haha. She say further than that yesterday Mr Pang talk to her of how i was getting along with everything and she told him la that I wasnt sure and she say to him that he was too much cause im not a programmer or something haha. Than i told her wah u say like that haha. Than i told her that what i heard of getting attached is that people would guide you to do stuff and all. Than she was like yaa she know but than no one is like there to guide me cause they were just trying to see if i can implement the system haha.. Ya la so overall it was all that .. Lets see what happen next right.. Cause Kak Nana say she will talk to Mr Pang for me as he's always very busy.. haha.

Finally everything seems ok le.. Like bonded with everyone already. The feeling of relieve has finally come!

Lol .. Im still in the stage of figuring out what i actually can do and can't do on the project i got. But things kinda alright only that im just really worried of how the outcome of everything gonna be still. Aiya i dont know what im talking about also haha nvm! Before the attachment my face was getting better maybe cause i was stress-free. But now the acne is getting worst again!! Dammit Stress really does cause ACNE!! DAMN !! Lol .. I should really feel less stress if i want to get my face any better or worst come to worst i really have to see a doctor =(! lol ... blehh ..

James Morrison - The pieces don't fit anymore

i've been twisting and turning in a space that's too small
i've been drawing the line and watching it fall
you've been closing me in , closing the space in my heart
watching us fading and watching us fall apart

well i can't explain why it's not enough
coz i gave it all to you
and if you leave me now
oh just leave me now
it's the better thing to do

it's time to surrender
it's been too long pretending
there's no use in trying
when the pieces don't fit anymore
the pieces don't fit here anymore

you pulled me under so i had to give in
such a beautiful mess that's breaking my skin
well i'll hide all the bruises; i'll hide all the damage that's done
but i show how i'm feeling until all the feeling has gone

why i can't explain why it's not enough
coz i gave it all to you
and if you leave me now
oh just leave me now
it's the better thing to do

it's time to surrender
it's been too long pretending
there's no use in trying
when the pieces don't fit anymore
the pieces don't fit anymore

oh, don't misunderstand how i feel
coz i've tried, yes i've tried
still i don't know why
no i don't know why
I dont know whyyyy
Whyyyy

Well i can't explain why it's not enough
coz i gave it all to you
and if you leave me now
oh just leave me now
it's the better thing to do

it's time to surrender
it's been too long pretending
there's no use in trying
when the pieces don't fit anymore
the pieces don't fit here anymore

The pieces don't fit here anymore ...

I got no time to snap pictures of every part of my company like everyone did cause im too stress already sighh ..

1st Day

I reach at 8.45am at the company cause first day mah want good impression but i got otherwise la haha! OK i reach i saw the door need to be scan to go in .. so i saw a phone outside .. search for the person in charge i need to meet name and i called but he hasnt come in yet .. Than someone came out of the lift .. and i was like thank god haha .. so i told him i was here for attachment .. I didnt know he was the guy who was in charge of me he never say what .. He was like just say .. "You suppose to come today?" than i was like yaa .. today lor haha .. than he ask me sit at the sofa at the reception .. Sit lor cause i didnt know he was the person in charge so i need to wait for the person what! LOL haizz so dumb ..

Than u know i wait until nearly 10 u know .. 1 hr plus ... until he call me to go in .. than go in also ... the person still setting up my com to be fix up so i can sit and have a com .. Like so wat lor wasnt ready for me to come .. Than never even introduce me to the company or show me around also .. I was like where to go toilet? Where to eat? Where to this and that .. Oh well but i was not that hopeless .. I knew the toilet where .. and i did find the company at lift lobby E .. haha just follow people mah LOL!

But than lunch was dumb la .. Because no one told me where was the canteen and all went to eat until the whole office empty even my in charge went .. Than i was like huhhh .. LOL .. so dumb la .. Than a nice lady come .. and was like "You never go eat? You know where's the canteen?" than i was like give her the blur look haha .. than she like explain this and that .. Thanks =P! Lol...

Ok i go too much forward le .. Go backwards .. after i got sat on my desk right .. the guy who was an IT in charge wasnt the person who in charge of me la which is the boss .. He was like done setting up my com .. than he ask me "Anything else you need?" I was like huh ... than i say i not sure what im suppose to do la .. than he go in the boss office than he came out than he tell me .. Later he will come out and talk to you .. I was like ok ... than sit down there for 3 whole hrs before lunch than he come talk to me ... Than BELOW is wat i type out what they ask me to do.. Ask me figure out myself .. and im doing it alone T_T God help me! LOL !! He was like gave me 5 days to think than he say tell him what i gonna do and stuff .. Haizz ..

Project Scope

The company is using Filemaker Pro 7 to keep track of the customers that have either buy their products, call for faulty issue or ask for assistance.
What the company wish to implement is that from the database information they have, to make the engineers' job easier they wish to have a website where
the engineers log in and they can check on the customer's details and confirm them etc. Furthermore, need to do a reporting function where which engineer attend to which customer and their mileage etc.

I lazy to blog about my 2nd and 3rd day cause its basically im still stressing all over the project on my own .. haha people close to me knows whats going on .. =P! Thanks you guys for being there for me .. Elsie, Sam, Zahid and others =)!

Oh man .. i cant believe starting attachment tmrw.. god .. haha .. Oh well .. have to go through it .. although not looking forward to it right ... hmphh gathering all my confidence ... haha ..

Watching Ugly Betty now on channel 5 .. than going to go sleep ... Have to be there at 9 am tomorrow .. until 6 pm .. so yaaa !! All the best for me and everyone else!

1 more day to spend till attachment starts!! Lol .. Check out this videos Im lovin them!! They are so cool and unique haha !!

30 seconds to mars - The Kill


Dixie Chicks - Not Ready To Make Nice

Just want to talk about a cartoon movie show i watch ... haha .. kinda sounds lame dont know how to explain it ..

I saw this "Cartoon" so many times actually .. Theres few people in the cartoon keep asking "why do they even exist?" when they are the biggest disaster on earth .. Not even accepting the way they are .. Living in sadness and denial for so long .. Getting judged by people .. They open up and everyone been saying different things ... But the most common thing everyone been saying is not to hate themselves .... but to love themselves .. but how could they when its so wrong .. Few say they can change ... or its just the way they are and they havent done anything thats wrong ... Now those people in the cartoon dont know what to do anymore cause the world seems so dead already ..

Pretty weird cartoon huh .. Lots of people actually are looking for acceptance .. but no one actually understand them .. and they arent selfish to actually want them to understand so they just isolate themselves .. and living off their own misery ..

A person in the cartoon says ...

Never have ever been selfish .. although sometimes u just cant control yourself .. Sigh u cant expect people to understand or accept the fact when u dont even understand it urself .. They dont actually understand what u been facing all ur life .. Having the thought of denying the actual fact for what it is .. Searching for people to accept the fact when its totally wrong to actually be ...

Earlier today went for the Attachment briefing .. haha .. it was cool and all .. after that .. went on my own to check out the place cause i got nothing better to do .. and wanted to see the place for myself .. and i know i would be so lazy to go and check it out on my other days haha ..

Oh well we didnt choose where we get attached to right .. But why must i go down the journey .. Like going to school !! Darn it haha .. the journey to school everyday .. maybe i got use to it .. even my attachment is the same journey to school .. Its 3d networks company about networking stuff -.- just great haha ... and its at ang mo kio there la.. but take 159 can reach there the bus stop just right in front of it ..



The picture of the building haha .. haizz .. All the best for me and everyone who is on attachment also .. And not forgetting those doing FYPJ and studies also =P!! ..